Vocabulary and films

Before, however, considering the almost entirely male preserve of the semi–autistic, let me first pick on one major cluster of differences between the “Clint Eastwoods” and the “Dolly Partons” that concern words, gestures and body language, the main focus of our previous chapter.

The vocabulary of the “Clints” really is as relatively reduced in life as it appears in the movies. Many men use fewer than 10,000 words a day – Pease suggests as low as 7,000 – whereas “Dolly” uses a robustly large volume of 20,000+ per day. The implications of this form the tip of a behavioural iceberg of consequences that affect us all every day.

Women use their words as a means of expressing their thoughts, of showing they care for someone, and of bonding. Their words are usually supported by a wide range of gestures, including touching, stroking, hugging and kissing. They will use their hands to add emphasis, their faces openly register a wide range of expressions, and they will go to great lengths to make and hold eye contact with each other. Frequently several will talk at the same time, and their voices will have great variety of tone, pitch and volume. They will be likely to be dressed in a broad array of bright and subtle colours. They will be talking about relationships. They are “empathetic”.

In stark contrast, “Clint” and his friends will make little eye contact. They will have quietly decided on their thoughts alone, their speech will focus largely on things, results, numbers, and on winning the argument. Their facial expressions will be minimal, as will their gestures. There may well be silences. They will take it in turns to speak, allowing the other to have his say. They will, of course, be dressed in muted dark greys, blues, sober suits. It is probable that they will not notice the body language of the other, nor even take on board the reaction to their words. They are “systemic”.

As a capricious final thought – our nation’s taste in films reinforces this. Girls favour romance, tears and Patrick Swayze sweeping them off their feet. Boys prize blood, war, criminals – vicious, violent and unflinchingly macho. The lists below were compiled by Tesco in a 2004 piece of research to initiate the company’s move into online DVD rental (Table 6.3).

Men’s and Women’s Top 20 Movies

table2

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